Boy Scouts of America

Close to 90,000 sexual abuse claims have been filed against the Boy Scouts of America [BSA] as the Monday deadline arrived for submitting claims in the organization’s bankruptcy case.

I was a Sea Scout (a part of the BSA) in my early teens and a fucker named Ronald S. Wentworth got me.

“We are devastated by the number of lives impacted by past abuse in Scouting and moved by the bravery of those who have come forward,” the Boy Scouts said in a statement. “We are heartbroken that we cannot undo their pain.”

I am one of the 88,500 who filed before the deadline and the BSA can never, ever, undo the pain that has controlled my life ever since Ronald S. Wentworth entered my life, my soul and crushed my future.

Hi Miki,

That is awful. The scars never leave of such horridness, there are some very evil people in the World and always have been.... I hope he burns in hell and I am quite a placid person, but child abuse, along with premeditated murder, rape and cruelty to animals are unforgiveable, even in my rabbity, forgiving eyes....

I am sure I told you of an Uncle that grabbed my behind, but maybe not of the music teacher that used his hands for punishment rather than a cane, for I never merited caning by other teachers, but the music teacher was prolific with his hand punishment, not just me, all the children and it would remain there too long between. Just glad caning and slapping is illegal in schools today. Then the sports master that cold showered us in the large open shower, we would cower and shiver for minutes. Then he'd called names out to run past him naked, I was always last or nearly so... it is on reflection, all abuse and possibly sexually motivated.

I share your pain a little, but it is only the fact that I know it happened to many, that I find solace. My Uncle was horrid, but I am over it all, I am mentally strong.

Celia xx

Celia Eriksson wrote: My Uncle was horrid, but I am over it all, I am mentally strong.

Celia, I am so glad you are, were able to put some of your past away and that you have been so much more self-actualizing than me.

I have carried the scar Ronald S. Wentworth inflicted upon me in 1960 and I will carry those scars to my grave.

Save for two instances so vividly burnt into my memory, my soul, I could have been a better husband, a better father, a better person. I know in my heart that I could have done things, many things that were foreclosed to me by my scars.

Some of us say our transness, our gender, our sexuality is ingrained in our genes. For me, my idea of gender and sexuality is from my experience. I do not shy from notions of my feminity but I am not female. I am not male, either. I am a product of what Ronald S. Wentworth did to me and I have only recently and reluctantly come to that realization. I think having too much time to myself, and the fact that the Boy Scouts of America, much like the Catholic church, have admitted to the horrors some of their leaders inflicted on children like I once was has allowed an introspection into my soul - into who I have become.

Being able to shout that Michael was scarred and he wants the world to know he was scarred has lifted a very heavy stone that I have carried around my soul for the last sixty years.

I am no longer Michael; that opportunity passed many, many years ago. I am also not Michaela, at least in the sense that you, Celia, and most of the other forum members know. But, I know that the feminine Michael is glad for the Michaela she is now.

Well it's good this is finally being addressed. For far too long this was covered up, ignored or frankly approved of. It wasn't as if any of this was a secret even at the time. As a child I knew about abuse physical and sexual even if I didn't experience it. Something I now realise makes me very lucky indeed.

So I can only imagine the pain. But based on the experience of abuse survivors in this country. Bringing it out in the open does seem to help.

I can only offer best wishes.