Name reaction

There's a guy in the office whose name is my birth name. I have caught myself more than once turning to respond when someone addressed him by name. Given that the name is a common one, this has happened to me a few times in other places, too.

This is despite over eight years of transition. It's hard to unlearn half a century of habit!

On the other side of the coin, I generally respond quickly to my chosen name, so that's good. Better than standing around thinking "I wonder who they're talking to."

I altered my spelling. But Leslie or Lesley, it pretty much sounds the same. Robert to Roberta was also not much of a change.
My new maiden name was a big thing for me though.

I never hated my name for the most part. And several years of people thinking my name was a girls name was interesting too.

I hated my previous occupant, not so much the name.
I went to Lesley so that in print form I could make a distinction.

In retrospect, I probably should have gone to a full-on change.

That is one of the reasons I chose Miki/Michaela. I'll not change my surname as that is something that belongs to me - my family history and I see no reason to toss it to the curb.

Umm, my old name is very common (both first and surname are in the top 5 ), so kind of got used to not responding in a non work environment. Although saying that I sometimes hear it mumbled some times there , normally when some one says some thing and leaves. I don't know if I am miss hearing or not, and don't want to appear a deaf and grumpy cow by asking what they said. Depends on my level of paranoia and angisty that day.

I use both names at work -- I usually call myself "Dawn" but if some calls me "Don", it's no big deal.

Jehanne wrote:I use both names at work -- I usually call myself "Dawn" but if some calls me "Don", it's no big deal.

Depending on where you live, those two names may be pronounced the same, or completely different. I would not pronounce them the same.

It's kind of strange -- sometimes one person will call me "Dawn" while speaking to me, and a few days later they'll say, "Don".  I can, however, tell the difference; I don't want to "correct" them, as my boss is actively looking for excuses to fire me as it is.  In fact, I have a formal HR action happening right now against me at my office; it's been going on now for over 2 months.  I go into work every day thinking that I am going to get canned.  (Maybe today will be the day?!)

That level of poisonous paranoia will actually harm you, dear.

Spend the time to find another job before the process erodes your health in a more serious fashion.

I speak from experience. I once had a no account, worthless excuse of a job, but it was all I had, and it paid the bills. The boss regularly and routinely moaned and complained about the expenses of staff and how they might not be able to remain in business. I let it get to me to the point I had a nervous breakdown. I missed a shift and arrived the next day with a doctor's note to find I had been pink-slipped out of a job. The thing is, ditching that job was actually a good thing. It forced my hand and led to me finding out about an entrepreneurial course that taught me I was perfectly suited to running my own business.

That workplace is likely never going to be good for your health and is likely one without any future.

Yeah, I can't give out too much ("they're watching!") information, but some big changes are happening at my office, maybe, a management shuffle.  But, yeah, I appreciate your words so very much!!!