Beginning to wonder WHAT my orientation actually is :)

Ok, guys still motivate me to want one.

I'm still desiring my old-fashioned and likely unrealistic cliche happily ever after wedding.

But recent events have me now questioning if I have a clue what I am for preference

You can't know a 'thing' if you have not experienced a 'thing' before.

So you might be hetero, or you might be bi. Hard to know if you are bi if you have never had both genders. Hard to know if you are pan, until put in a situation to experience a pan situation.

I'm currently dating a pan, poly transgender female. Which means my date is a amab ie assigned male at birth person. And they are pan, ie they don't care what their partner's orientation is. And they are poly, ie they are not concerned if they have more than 1 partner, and don't care if I have more than 1 partner.

And I'm starting to wonder if I have my own labels correct

Good for you.

So in fact your date is just like me except I don't do labels and in practice the situation doesn't arise much. Although there was the Lingerie guy whose wife knew about him meeting others. So maybe they were pan poly too.

I don't think labels and perceived orientation matter at all. Because if you meet someone you're comfortable with and yes fall in love with then those considerations are merely academic. My wife is someone I'd never have seen as my preference. Almost the opposite in fact of my preference for women and in reality these days men are my preference. I too harbour the white wedding fantasy and the happy ever after with a sexy guy who looks after me. But it won't happen and anyway I like my wife and we are comfortable together most of the time. We're like two older lesbians. I'm the butch one.

Everyone, I mean everyone, is different. I don't find feminine women even slightly attractive and even the 'butch' ones have to be real butch for me to give them a second glance, it's always been men with me and they have to be taller and about my age or older.

But I did have a 'thing' for a while only a couple of years ago, about a very tall blonde woman of a similar age, mid-fifties. She was feminine and showed a hell of a lot of interest in me, which surprised me coz she was six inches taller! I guess that might have triggered something in me, for although she was slim, she clearly had a powerful body. I told myself that she probably was lesbian and just thought I was different, a little cute, only liking me for that. I'd have had difficulty wanting to be 'tween the sheets with her anyway.

Could I date another transgender woman? No, it don't do it for me. But I wish you both well Lesley!


Celia xx

Celia Eriksson wrote:Everyone, I mean everyone, is different. I don't find feminine women even slightly attractive and even the 'butch' ones have to be real butch for me to give them a second glance, it's always been men with me and they have to be taller and about my age or older.

But I did have a 'thing' for a while only a couple of years ago, about a very tall blonde woman of a similar age, mid-fifties. She was feminine and showed a hell of a lot of interest in me, which surprised me coz she was six inches taller! I guess that might have triggered something in me, for although she was slim, she clearly had a powerful body. I told myself that she probably was lesbian and just thought I was different, a little cute, only liking me for that. I'd have had difficulty wanting to be 'tween the sheets with her anyway.

Could I date another transgender woman? No, it don't do it for me. But I wish you both well Lesley!


Celia xx

This is the story of it. The people you want, dont often seem to want you, and the people who want you, you don't often seem to want them.

I would give anything for a tall hot blonde to take an interest in me. But of course, the prize goes to the person who doesn't even want the prize. And that is why I have always preached against the dating mechanics for this reason. Something is really wrong with a world where this kind of stuff happens on a regular basis.

It's like, the person who doesn't like aspargus is given a lifetime supply of asparagus. And the person who just wants some mayonaisse, is routinely denied any access of mayonnaise.