Defending my love
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Defending my love
Angelic Mon Aug 06, 2018 3:41 pm
So it's like, some people have been calling me hypersexual and a nymphomaniac, and it's like this. If you got as little love as me you'd be obsessed with romance too. It's the same as a Somalian who fantasizes and is obsessed about going to the Americas. Or a poor person fantasizes about living the good life. People naturally want what they are not allowed to have. And yet the boot of the priviledged often comes down on them in haughtyness.
I am here to say nymphomania isn't even the full picture of my mornings. My mornings usually go like this: I remember a good, non-sexual dream I had. I wake up feeling good. Then, I see my phone. My phone triggers me of all the bad memories and let-downs and relationships stolen from me. Now my mind is looping negatively, about a girl who has been unfair and unreasonable to me. How all the males in the world can get dates, but I am the one male who can never get a date.
So it's like, not even sexual at this point. At this point I think about what a good life I could have. And how my girlfriend would have made my life and career improve. And I am not even thinking about sex, but the increased privileges and good things I could enjoy, if I had a girlfriend. And it enrages me like, everyone else can have the good life, except me. And say a girl has hobbies and is an expert at hobbies I am interested in. She could be my ticket into the good life, because she has so many friends and connections with these hobbies, but I am denied access into even my own hobbies, hobbies which aren't even sexual hobbies. It's enraging and maddening.
And here, is the part of me that people aren't getting. How much torment I have to go through when I get into these loops. And then they shame my sexuality, because they have a shallow understanding of me. My thoughts loop and loop thinking about negative things. And you know what saves me? Thinking about sex. I start to masturbate between my jeans and imagine I have a vagina. And then the rage starts to subside and peace and calm starts to wash over me. And yet, people shame me for this, they want me to be in rage and misery all day and shame me for the one thing that calms me down and gets rid of the rage.
And then the fantasy continues, that I am pleasuring cute males and fulfilling their every fantasy. So I go to google Sex-change pov and there is no results. Then I google female pov. There are results, but the camera looks stupid and off, like it is floating above their head and not a real pov, so it makes me lose my sex-drive because of how stupid it is. Then I find some animated Pov porn which is actualy good. But I am afraid to click it because the site may give me viruses. So I am tormented by these virus fuckwads ruining the internet. I wish anyone who made a virus got the firing squad. So I can't even get any release.
But the truth is I try not to orgasm. Its been a month since I orgasmed, when I orgasm I feel hollow and depressed, like sober. Like the fantasy is over. All of my life is a fantasy. I fantasize about greatness, being president someday. And yet little shitbags on facebook try to disagree with me about my politics. Little runts, who are they? They are inferior to me. I imagine that I am a busty My Little Pony teenage girl who became a still beautiful, 40 year old adult, and am running for president, with giant banners of my visage everywhere and I am standing on stage being admired and glorified and turned into an internet meme and legend, and everyone loves and adores me. And yet, some naysayers have the nerve to reduce this magnificence to AGP insignificance. What, because I said I was busty in this fantasy? It wasn't even a sex-fantasy. It was more like a Messiahnic fantasy of meglomania and taking over the world to save the planet. And Frued would argue my bustyness is a metaphor of my desire to save the planet and give milk and life to the world, and that it is a metaphor of me being nurturing and mother nature. And that it is a subconscious Messiah fantasy of how Jesus was motherly and nurturing and the flocks came to him.
Now, since you brought up the topic of AGP, lets talk about that. Lets talk about how many cis-women are AGP. You think those tall women who have perfect hair, perfect accesories and fashion, and get boob jobs all day, are somehow not AGP? I know women. Women secretly admit to me they lust after women's buttcheeks when other women walk by. So let's talk about this. Let's talk about how women's attraction to tall males is nothing more than a fetish. An agp fetish of wanting to feel small and dominated. Because I am a tall male. And yet some women say I'm so cute, why don't I have a girlfriend? Well maybe it's because women just randomly fetishize me and never get serious about commiting to me. Because most relationships are same-height relationships. We have a new-ism, height-ism. And I am fucking pissed off about it. I am so sick of being discriminated because I'm too tall for women. Height-ism is the latest form of being hosed in the social department.
Now lets talk about the real nature of women. The real nature of women is to be tall and strong, taller and stronger and more nurturing than the male. Princess peach is naturally taller than both mario and luigi. And why do you think Mario is the best selling franchise? Because it feels natural to people. Because it feels right to people. When I was watching those POV porns I realized this. The woman is supposed to be slightly bigger than the male. To please the male and fulfill his fantasies. She is the Messiah, the saviour to the male. To guide him and give him advice. To advise him to not spend his money on stupid shit. To watch from a distance as he fights his own battles, in order not to emasculate him too much. To help him grow into a stronger, wiser man. And what are American women these days? Entilted. They think men only exist as walking cash registers to give them gifts and money every day. Women stand at the finish line, waiting for men to succeed. They wont give you the time of day unless you have money for them. They have no nurturing qualities and expect men to nurture them and put up with their endless childish bs. Women aren't even sexually attractive anymore except on a shallow physical level, because none of them even act like the natural role of women anymore. Women aren't even shy or feminine anymore, they are more confident and masculine than most men. And then people go around inverting gender, saying being shy is masculine, and that being confident is feminine.
So does gender actually exist? No. In all beings there exists masculine and feminine energies. And it doesn't actually matter how you cultivate these energies at all. Because society assigns a gender based on your genetic, physical form that you got born into. Doesn't matter if you are a man who has more feminine energies than masculine, or a woman with more masculine energies than feminine, all people see is a genetic male or female body, and assign a gender to you. Gender isn't real. Here's an example. Jon Tron probably has more estrogen than some women and his face looks girly. And yet, he does not pass as a woman, he is physically obviously male. And yet, some high-testerone women, do rugby, and rugby scare the daylights out of some timid, fearful men. And you can tell these women have hardly any estrogen in their face. And yet they look unmistakably female, simply because of their genetic, bone structure they were born with. And this is why some people prefer trans-women. Because even though the bone structure is male, you can tell they have more estrogen in their face and look more like old-fashioned women, even if they do not pass.
So what is my point of all this? Point is I'm angry. Fed up. Sick of it. And I posted this because people seem to have a shallow understanding of my nymphomania, and they don't understand the deep Shakesperian tragedy beneath the surface, that is more than just simple cookie cutter nymphomania. Nothing about me is cookie cutter. I am from the space age. What are most people from? The dark ages. Shallow. Simpletons. Unenlightened. Enemies of progress. Savages.
In terms of romance, 2018 doesn't cut it. This is not the age of aquarius. This is not the age of love. The hippies let us all down.
I am here to say nymphomania isn't even the full picture of my mornings. My mornings usually go like this: I remember a good, non-sexual dream I had. I wake up feeling good. Then, I see my phone. My phone triggers me of all the bad memories and let-downs and relationships stolen from me. Now my mind is looping negatively, about a girl who has been unfair and unreasonable to me. How all the males in the world can get dates, but I am the one male who can never get a date.
So it's like, not even sexual at this point. At this point I think about what a good life I could have. And how my girlfriend would have made my life and career improve. And I am not even thinking about sex, but the increased privileges and good things I could enjoy, if I had a girlfriend. And it enrages me like, everyone else can have the good life, except me. And say a girl has hobbies and is an expert at hobbies I am interested in. She could be my ticket into the good life, because she has so many friends and connections with these hobbies, but I am denied access into even my own hobbies, hobbies which aren't even sexual hobbies. It's enraging and maddening.
And here, is the part of me that people aren't getting. How much torment I have to go through when I get into these loops. And then they shame my sexuality, because they have a shallow understanding of me. My thoughts loop and loop thinking about negative things. And you know what saves me? Thinking about sex. I start to masturbate between my jeans and imagine I have a vagina. And then the rage starts to subside and peace and calm starts to wash over me. And yet, people shame me for this, they want me to be in rage and misery all day and shame me for the one thing that calms me down and gets rid of the rage.
And then the fantasy continues, that I am pleasuring cute males and fulfilling their every fantasy. So I go to google Sex-change pov and there is no results. Then I google female pov. There are results, but the camera looks stupid and off, like it is floating above their head and not a real pov, so it makes me lose my sex-drive because of how stupid it is. Then I find some animated Pov porn which is actualy good. But I am afraid to click it because the site may give me viruses. So I am tormented by these virus fuckwads ruining the internet. I wish anyone who made a virus got the firing squad. So I can't even get any release.
But the truth is I try not to orgasm. Its been a month since I orgasmed, when I orgasm I feel hollow and depressed, like sober. Like the fantasy is over. All of my life is a fantasy. I fantasize about greatness, being president someday. And yet little shitbags on facebook try to disagree with me about my politics. Little runts, who are they? They are inferior to me. I imagine that I am a busty My Little Pony teenage girl who became a still beautiful, 40 year old adult, and am running for president, with giant banners of my visage everywhere and I am standing on stage being admired and glorified and turned into an internet meme and legend, and everyone loves and adores me. And yet, some naysayers have the nerve to reduce this magnificence to AGP insignificance. What, because I said I was busty in this fantasy? It wasn't even a sex-fantasy. It was more like a Messiahnic fantasy of meglomania and taking over the world to save the planet. And Frued would argue my bustyness is a metaphor of my desire to save the planet and give milk and life to the world, and that it is a metaphor of me being nurturing and mother nature. And that it is a subconscious Messiah fantasy of how Jesus was motherly and nurturing and the flocks came to him.
Now, since you brought up the topic of AGP, lets talk about that. Lets talk about how many cis-women are AGP. You think those tall women who have perfect hair, perfect accesories and fashion, and get boob jobs all day, are somehow not AGP? I know women. Women secretly admit to me they lust after women's buttcheeks when other women walk by. So let's talk about this. Let's talk about how women's attraction to tall males is nothing more than a fetish. An agp fetish of wanting to feel small and dominated. Because I am a tall male. And yet some women say I'm so cute, why don't I have a girlfriend? Well maybe it's because women just randomly fetishize me and never get serious about commiting to me. Because most relationships are same-height relationships. We have a new-ism, height-ism. And I am fucking pissed off about it. I am so sick of being discriminated because I'm too tall for women. Height-ism is the latest form of being hosed in the social department.
Now lets talk about the real nature of women. The real nature of women is to be tall and strong, taller and stronger and more nurturing than the male. Princess peach is naturally taller than both mario and luigi. And why do you think Mario is the best selling franchise? Because it feels natural to people. Because it feels right to people. When I was watching those POV porns I realized this. The woman is supposed to be slightly bigger than the male. To please the male and fulfill his fantasies. She is the Messiah, the saviour to the male. To guide him and give him advice. To advise him to not spend his money on stupid shit. To watch from a distance as he fights his own battles, in order not to emasculate him too much. To help him grow into a stronger, wiser man. And what are American women these days? Entilted. They think men only exist as walking cash registers to give them gifts and money every day. Women stand at the finish line, waiting for men to succeed. They wont give you the time of day unless you have money for them. They have no nurturing qualities and expect men to nurture them and put up with their endless childish bs. Women aren't even sexually attractive anymore except on a shallow physical level, because none of them even act like the natural role of women anymore. Women aren't even shy or feminine anymore, they are more confident and masculine than most men. And then people go around inverting gender, saying being shy is masculine, and that being confident is feminine.
So does gender actually exist? No. In all beings there exists masculine and feminine energies. And it doesn't actually matter how you cultivate these energies at all. Because society assigns a gender based on your genetic, physical form that you got born into. Doesn't matter if you are a man who has more feminine energies than masculine, or a woman with more masculine energies than feminine, all people see is a genetic male or female body, and assign a gender to you. Gender isn't real. Here's an example. Jon Tron probably has more estrogen than some women and his face looks girly. And yet, he does not pass as a woman, he is physically obviously male. And yet, some high-testerone women, do rugby, and rugby scare the daylights out of some timid, fearful men. And you can tell these women have hardly any estrogen in their face. And yet they look unmistakably female, simply because of their genetic, bone structure they were born with. And this is why some people prefer trans-women. Because even though the bone structure is male, you can tell they have more estrogen in their face and look more like old-fashioned women, even if they do not pass.
So what is my point of all this? Point is I'm angry. Fed up. Sick of it. And I posted this because people seem to have a shallow understanding of my nymphomania, and they don't understand the deep Shakesperian tragedy beneath the surface, that is more than just simple cookie cutter nymphomania. Nothing about me is cookie cutter. I am from the space age. What are most people from? The dark ages. Shallow. Simpletons. Unenlightened. Enemies of progress. Savages.
In terms of romance, 2018 doesn't cut it. This is not the age of aquarius. This is not the age of love. The hippies let us all down.
Angelic- Posts : 473
Join date : 2018-06-19
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