I have no idea where to post this LOL
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I have no idea where to post this LOL
It's not an introduction since I joined years ago, it's not necessarily related to my transition, etc. so I suppose this section will do. A little about me, I guess.
Okay, so I joined tgboards when I was 19. Things were rough, to put it mildly. Black trans woman. I had no friends in real life, grew up in a very bad area (statistically speaking it's one of the most dangerous in the country), and with a family that's way more insane than Westboro Baptist. I ran away from home without explaining why but had to go back because I was robbed. I hit rock bottom; lost everything except the clothes on my back and a portable gaming device. I still felt safer on the streets, though, because my family is just that threatening. Fast forward a bit and once again I hit rock bottom by running away a second time before I was financially stable. And this time I never looked back. I had to balance college with homelessness and eventually work was thrown in the mix and I caught pneumonia so that was fun. There were many nights when I didn't eat and/or sleep because I couldn't. Homelessness is isolating/dehumanizing enough, but add being trans (and for a brief time ill) to the mix and hoo boy. And that's roughly where I left off the last time that I was active here: in survival mode. Just trying my hardest to make the most of a dire situation.
And I'm proud to say, it paid off. I'm no longer homeless. In fact, I'm doing quite well off monetarily. I'm so glad that I can live my best life without my toxic family in it. A few years ago I wouldn't have imagined being where I am today; physically, mentally, financially, emotionally—I'm in a good place.
It sucks that sometimes we have to endure and sacrifice so much just to simply exist, ya know? As mawkish as it sounds, what kept me going was the idea that I wasn't just fighting for myself, but I had to fight for our brothers, sisters, and piblings who didn't make it. That and the fact that I remember every nice gesture from every person, stranger or otherwise during that time. From the manager at a Papa Johns who gave me a free bottle of water, to Helen from tgboards who gave me a giftcard for my birthday (it's unlikely you'd see this but if so, I hope you're doing well and I'm eternally grateful)! I kept going so that I could one day pay it all forward.
A long time ago, I shared my struggles, so it's nice to just share how things are currently. Take care, all!
Okay, so I joined tgboards when I was 19. Things were rough, to put it mildly. Black trans woman. I had no friends in real life, grew up in a very bad area (statistically speaking it's one of the most dangerous in the country), and with a family that's way more insane than Westboro Baptist. I ran away from home without explaining why but had to go back because I was robbed. I hit rock bottom; lost everything except the clothes on my back and a portable gaming device. I still felt safer on the streets, though, because my family is just that threatening. Fast forward a bit and once again I hit rock bottom by running away a second time before I was financially stable. And this time I never looked back. I had to balance college with homelessness and eventually work was thrown in the mix and I caught pneumonia so that was fun. There were many nights when I didn't eat and/or sleep because I couldn't. Homelessness is isolating/dehumanizing enough, but add being trans (and for a brief time ill) to the mix and hoo boy. And that's roughly where I left off the last time that I was active here: in survival mode. Just trying my hardest to make the most of a dire situation.
And I'm proud to say, it paid off. I'm no longer homeless. In fact, I'm doing quite well off monetarily. I'm so glad that I can live my best life without my toxic family in it. A few years ago I wouldn't have imagined being where I am today; physically, mentally, financially, emotionally—I'm in a good place.
It sucks that sometimes we have to endure and sacrifice so much just to simply exist, ya know? As mawkish as it sounds, what kept me going was the idea that I wasn't just fighting for myself, but I had to fight for our brothers, sisters, and piblings who didn't make it. That and the fact that I remember every nice gesture from every person, stranger or otherwise during that time. From the manager at a Papa Johns who gave me a free bottle of water, to Helen from tgboards who gave me a giftcard for my birthday (it's unlikely you'd see this but if so, I hope you're doing well and I'm eternally grateful)! I kept going so that I could one day pay it all forward.
A long time ago, I shared my struggles, so it's nice to just share how things are currently. Take care, all!
Anna Mull- Posts : 82
Join date : 2018-05-22
Age : 30
Celia Eriksson, Lesley Niyori, Kaibeth and Mariehart11 like this post
Re: I have no idea where to post this LOL
Wow! Makes my issues seem trivial. I don't know if you've seen 'Pose' on Netflix. Set in NY in the eighties. I absolutely loved that series and at least one character who was black and part of an extreme religious family. Had a similar experience. I've no idea how you can call yourself Christian and hate your own children?
I'm delighted you came through it thus far. Are you transitioning right now? Where are you living?
You're very articulate, something I note Americans often are. You express yourself brilliantly. You're right about the little kindnesses.
They always sit high in your mind. Often I feel that the fear of rejection paralyses but in reality people are mostly kind. When i finally came out to people what struck me was how accepting they were, friends, my sister, work colleagues.
Not my wife though, although I understand her dilemma.
Not that I took advantage, full retreat me!
Please continue to contribute. I suspect your voyage through life will remain interesting. Your struggles are never boring to those of who struggle too.
Take care
I'm delighted you came through it thus far. Are you transitioning right now? Where are you living?
You're very articulate, something I note Americans often are. You express yourself brilliantly. You're right about the little kindnesses.
They always sit high in your mind. Often I feel that the fear of rejection paralyses but in reality people are mostly kind. When i finally came out to people what struck me was how accepting they were, friends, my sister, work colleagues.
Not my wife though, although I understand her dilemma.
Not that I took advantage, full retreat me!
Please continue to contribute. I suspect your voyage through life will remain interesting. Your struggles are never boring to those of who struggle too.
Take care
Mariehart11- Posts : 426
Join date : 2021-12-31
Location : West of Ireland
Re: I have no idea where to post this LOL
Hi Anna and Marie,
I think I remember Anna, when you posted about being homeless.... unless it was someone else and I am mistaken....
Gosh, was it that long ago, if it was, on the old boards? I cannot remember what you wrote, but I do remember feeling awful for you and hoping you were going to be ok. I did not know about the gift voucher, but well done them for showing such kindness.
I do remember some of the names, not all by far, who were there at the tgboards. Do you remember CuteButLooksPregnant for example, the ice skater, we called her CBLP. Angel was there, (Angelic here, I think she called herself Angel back then). I know that Papillon was there and here. ChristineMcKeehan, Lucy-chan, (Lucy Schoon, from here?), Sjizuku and DawnF? I think Andina ran the site????
Then the ones we know here, You, Lesley, Rebecca, Tara, Michaela, Marie, Kaida (Kaibeth).... Abby, Liz, Jentay, Dreamin', oh and Kermit, who fleetingly was there, then here, (he just liked transgender women), anyone else I have forgotten/missed?
I should go back to the 'wayback machine', it shows some pages from the old boards. Cleverly someone though of capturing webpages for posterity, knowing that many disappear int the ether.... woooo!!! I DID find the final front page and was gonna post it here, but maybe I would breach rights.... it is easy to find on wayback machine!!!
Celia xx
I think I remember Anna, when you posted about being homeless.... unless it was someone else and I am mistaken....
Gosh, was it that long ago, if it was, on the old boards? I cannot remember what you wrote, but I do remember feeling awful for you and hoping you were going to be ok. I did not know about the gift voucher, but well done them for showing such kindness.
I do remember some of the names, not all by far, who were there at the tgboards. Do you remember CuteButLooksPregnant for example, the ice skater, we called her CBLP. Angel was there, (Angelic here, I think she called herself Angel back then). I know that Papillon was there and here. ChristineMcKeehan, Lucy-chan, (Lucy Schoon, from here?), Sjizuku and DawnF? I think Andina ran the site????
Then the ones we know here, You, Lesley, Rebecca, Tara, Michaela, Marie, Kaida (Kaibeth).... Abby, Liz, Jentay, Dreamin', oh and Kermit, who fleetingly was there, then here, (he just liked transgender women), anyone else I have forgotten/missed?
I should go back to the 'wayback machine', it shows some pages from the old boards. Cleverly someone though of capturing webpages for posterity, knowing that many disappear int the ether.... woooo!!! I DID find the final front page and was gonna post it here, but maybe I would breach rights.... it is easy to find on wayback machine!!!
Celia xx
Re: I have no idea where to post this LOL
Interesting C.
Mariehart11- Posts : 426
Join date : 2021-12-31
Location : West of Ireland
Re: I have no idea where to post this LOL
Mariehart11 wrote:Wow! Makes my issues seem trivial. I don't know if you've seen 'Pose' on Netflix. Set in NY in the eighties. I absolutely loved that series and at least one character who was black and part of an extreme religious family. Had a similar experience. I've no idea how you can call yourself Christian and hate your own children?
I'm delighted you came through it thus far. Are you transitioning right now? Where are you living?
You're very articulate, something I note Americans often are. You express yourself brilliantly. You're right about the little kindnesses.
They always sit high in your mind. Often I feel that the fear of rejection paralyses but in reality people are mostly kind. When i finally came out to people what struck me was how accepting they were, friends, my sister, work colleagues.
Not my wife though, although I understand her dilemma.
Not that I took advantage, full retreat me!
Please continue to contribute. I suspect your voyage through life will remain interesting. Your struggles are never boring to those of who struggle too.
Take care
Thanks!
Your problems are no less important than anyone else's, and whatever they may be, I hope that you can overcome them!
I haven't seen Pose, but I'll check it out one day.
I believe the answer to that question is that they're driven by fear, benightedness, and bitterness. Even so, it's always dreadful to see others advocate cruelty by wrapping it in the mantle of sanctity.
Yes, I'm transitioning. I live in California.
Celia Eriksson wrote:Hi Anna and Marie,
I think I remember Anna, when you posted about being homeless.... unless it was someone else and I am mistaken....
Gosh, was it that long ago, if it was, on the old boards? I cannot remember what you wrote, but I do remember feeling awful for you and hoping you were going to be ok. I did not know about the gift voucher, but well done them for showing such kindness.
I do remember some of the names, not all by far, who were there at the tgboards. Do you remember CuteButLooksPregnant for example, the ice skater, we called her CBLP. Angel was there, (Angelic here, I think she called herself Angel back then). I know that Papillon was there and here. ChristineMcKeehan, Lucy-chan, (Lucy Schoon, from here?), Sjizuku and DawnF? I think Andina ran the site????
Then the ones we know here, You, Lesley, Rebecca, Tara, Michaela, Marie, Kaida (Kaibeth).... Abby, Liz, Jentay, Dreamin', oh and Kermit, who fleetingly was there, then here, (he just liked transgender women), anyone else I have forgotten/missed?
I should go back to the 'wayback machine', it shows some pages from the old boards. Cleverly someone though of capturing webpages for posterity, knowing that many disappear int the ether.... woooo!!! I DID find the final front page and was gonna post it here, but maybe I would breach rights.... it is easy to find on wayback machine!!!
Celia xx
I appreciate your concern, and I'm grateful to say that I'm doing quite well nowadays. I remember pretty much every active user on tgboards circa 2014 until it closed down. My username on the old forum was Shizuku. I'm both surprised and flattered that you remembered!
Anna Mull- Posts : 82
Join date : 2018-05-22
Age : 30
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