Just Bunny (new directions)

I took this from my Facebook.
It's relevant here too.

I will be entering March as 'just Bunny'.
Just Bunny, a kid in an old body.
A kid in a disabled old body.
Because all my other traits and qualities aren't really limits.

I can make models, or choose to never do them ever again.
I can write romance novels, or not, my choice.
I can paint great landscapes, or not. My decision.
I love my Barbies, but life would go on without them.
Legos, I can make them all, or leave in a bin in bags.
Books, I can always buy more, if I had to.
I'm highly educated, but, I don't have to use it.
These all define me, but they don't limit me.

If I could walk away from my disability, I sure as hell would.
I don't like being a kid. I've yet to get any benefit from it.

I have treated being transgender as if it were worse than being disabled. Frankly, it isn't. If I was forced, by some life and death need, I could take off the wig, dress like a man, and short of stripping me, you won't know I'm a woman. I wish I could fake being healthy, but I can't.

Each day when I wake, my disability greets me. And I worry, will I be able to take care of myself in the future? It bothers me what Doug Ford is doing. But my being transgender, has been an overrated concern. I gave it too much power over me. I foolishly did it to myself. I was suicidal thanks to the worries I created thanks to it.
The ONLY real 'need' I have had since my journey began, was a need for GRS. But everything before GRS, and since GRS, has been given more influence than it deserved.

I'm trying to correct this now.
I'm really, just Bunny, a kid in an old body when it comes to real problems. Problems I seem to have no control over.
In comparison, being transgender was easy to fix. New name, new clothes, new attitude.
I wish fibromyalgia was so easy to fix.

Hi Lesley!

I am sure I told you this nugget, dear Bunny, (hope you don't miss me at Easter ), worry is a useless state of mind. You need to train yourself not to worry or stress over anything!

It goes like this......

If you are worried about something you can do something about..... then for the love of God, do it!!!!

If you are worried about something you can do nothing about.... then for the love of God, stop worrying, you can't do anything and worrying will make whatever it is worse!!!!!

I know you are a colourful person. I know you enjoy doing your own thing. I know you have lots of hobbies and cycling and other stuff you enjoy. Lesley, you will be fine. Keep on keeping on girl!!! Enjoy, savour every moment, for we pass this way but once..... and worry not.

Celia xx